Minute to minute report for Wednesday, August something or other. There is a birthday cake for Claudia, that's how I know it's August.
9am: I'm totally psyched about my swim for today, I am so going to rock this swim with my awesomeness, I can feel it. In fact, I'm going to skip the gym so I can really commit. You know, give it my all.
9:45: Stuck in traffic on the hill, on one side are giant trash trucks blowing black exhaust directly into my car, the other side are the are the tourists who are new to the planet and driving. My pre swim charge is at stake so I decide to use my overall pissed off attitude as fuel for the swim. That's right, ride that brake up the hill and go ahead, slow the f*ck down going downhill, I can take it.
10:00: Oh my God, what is going on? Why am I stopped? Where are all these people going? I hate the people and La Jolla. I put on my running music, it's all kind of hard charged, high BPM stuff, at least I'll be distracted while sitting in traffic. Damn.
10:10: Geez, finally! I peek down at the water on my way into the garage, it looks beautiful!
I'm back now, ready for my A game!
10:20: I grab Claudia from the garage, walk down and hear the report; aww, jellyfish everywhere, kelp everywhere, zero viz. I am not worried though, I'll avoid the Jellyfish, I don't mind kelp, we'll swim to Children's where it looks much cleaner.
10:30: I spot Ethan who is literally passed out on a bench, sweating his hangover off. Um, Ethan? Hello, you okay? He's fine as anyone would be after drinking until 3am, duh. I cannot see his eyes due to his tiredness. My partner, I'm so proud. We need to talk after this swim.
10:40: I swim out 100 yards and ran smack into a black Jelly, my entire arm snagged the sucker from wrist to shoulder. It's ok, I just need to get around take off, then I'll be golden.
10:45: The water is cleaner, way cleaner on this side but there is limited viz and a wild current beneath making me nauseous, ewww, I feel seasick! And, there are wicked cold spots which are shocking after the general 70 degree temps.
10:59: I wanna go back, I whine to Claudia. Claudia can swim in anything, she's just swimming along, unruffled by all, Ethan is too but for for different reasons.
11:10: I run into another disgusting black blob, this time my right armpit and neck. Gross and I'm stinging all over, my entire body is reacting with stinging sensations.
11:15: I'm sweating in the 70 degrees, I need to conserve! I'm dehydrated! What if I have an anaphylactic reaction! What is that? Something touched me!
11:30: Swimming across a minefield, kelp to the right, jellyfish to the left and in between lies the kelp/jellyfish nests. At least I am headed in, not even swimming now, just sidestroking and looking around for things that will hurt me.
11:35 I make Claudia collect trash from an infested kelp bed, it's for the earth, I tell her. She believes me and waded right into the mess to save the planet. I love her for this but I was so outta there.
11:45: I didn't even swim, I got wet and stung. And picked up trash. Isn't that like a scolding from your mom when you were a kid? Like some kind of torture?
12:00: I am in Trader Joe's buying large bags of snack food including something called 'Cookie Butter'. I have no idea what it is but it looked good and I had to soothe my soul after the trauma.
We ate coconut popsicles in the parking lot which was the hilight of my day.
There you have it: a minute to minute report.
lftc-out
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