once and for all, the straight dope

An open letter to my swim peeps, once and for all: I'm over the cove surf; little, big, no power, fluffy, easy, steep, low and so on. I'm also not a big believer in the 'lull', I have a wave attractant, like a surf beacon! You all have been witness to this anomaly. I have had offers from all of you to 'help me out', to hold my hand,  (thank you Stevie D., really cool offer but pass. I'll still hold your hand though) to give me a lesson, to wait with me and so on. I have told some or all of you about my ocean life but I want to make clear my history with surf: I was born in the water, I lived and grew up on the beach, I knew how to swim from a young age, I surfed as a teenager and when surf was too big, I jumped off the IB pier. I have swam and raced in tri's from IB to Santa Barbara, I was a PADI divemaster for awhile and I made money doing it. I have been slammed into the sea floor on more than one occasion and I was never afraid. I just had no fear. After Ali was born I found myself back in the water, this time Oceanside was my sea of choice, I belonged to a group called 'Dive Deep Swimmers'. We swam all around the area and pier swims were our thing. The name Dive Deep was coined due to relentless surf, we had to 'dive deep' every single swim, over and over.  I logged many miles with this group and there was/is ALWAYS surf. I still had no fear until-I stupidly did some sprints to the beach in front of a huge set, I couldn't beat the waves and I was being thrashed over and over due to the speed and size of the surf. I thought I was going to die and while being tossed mercilessly around I kept thinking about Ali, how she wouldn't have a mom to buy her shoes at Nordstrom, Dave would take her to the 7-11 for flip flops. When my body scraped the sand, I knew I'd live but I was deeply shaken. But! I still swam in the surf, I was more cautious but driven to swim in open water. Then the annual pier swim sealed my fate. In particularly large surf, reported as up to 10', I couldn't make my heat along with dozens of other swimmers, we all tried but just could not get out. Rather than quit, I tried for a fourth time and by chance I found a sliver of passage, literally a section between crossing waves and I swam out. I looked up and I saw the next wave face and I said, to no one, 'Oh shit' . I didn't know it but I was being followed by a guard on a board who yelled at me to SWIM! I did and I swear to you, I fell off the back of that wave and I was out. When I came around to the north side of the pier the surf had picked up and I didn't know how I was going to get in. For the first time in my life, I asked a guard to help and this kid, (I love him to this day and would have married him if he were over 18) guided me in. That was the beginning of the real end. I still have found myself in surf, I have been thrashed at the cove, right on the rocks, I have been pummeled at the shores, I have been scraped along the sand at the marine room and spit out of the ocean more than once since Oceanside.
So you see, it's not for lack of experience with surf, it's really about my reasons for avoiding it; peace and joy, harmony with the sea and a calming of my inner self. Not to mention the voices in my head, they really STFU in the cold. It's adventurous already! Let me say that again: already it's thrilling and slightly risky, physically all encompassing and a complete sensory experience. The surf, especially cove surf, takes all that pleasure and squashes it down, down, down. For me. However you all or anybody deals with it is not my business.
You all know I swim a lot, maybe 300 days a year or more, I'll swim in anything, rain, runoff, red tide, surge, fast currents, chop so high you can't see a thing, wind, sub zero viz, long distance, short distance, fast and slow, 54 degrees to 76, I swam in Kauai and Maui all alone in tiger shark territory, it's all good. I still swim in surf at the shores but I'm gonna say it once more: I'm over cove surf. You know if you need a partner in any of the above conditions, I'm your go to girl, I'll totally hook you up someway, somehow but if we are dealing with cove homisurf, I'm so out. I'll take you off the pier, I'll meet you in our boat, I'll summon dolphins, anything! Just don't hassle me over waves so that we may swim forever. It's all I want.

Peace!
lftc-out